We have to admit that the toddler stage is one of the most difficult times to train and teach a child. I know you’ve come across this post because you’re wondering how to make toddlers listen.
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I have heard stories and seen parents lose their patience just because their toddler insists on their own way. No matter how hard they try to tell them “No!”, I see these cute little humans delve into crying and tantrums.
The reason behind the challenge in training and teaching a toddler is because of the developmental stage they are already in.
Toddlers are in the time of their lives where they start to become active, always moving around, and are starting to become aware of who they are and their surroundings. They already have a strong desire to explore unfamiliar objects and new people around them.
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Because of this, toddlers will start to show independence, choosing to do things based on how they want to do. They will have a defiant attitude. Also, this is the time where they can recognize themselves in mirror or picture and will imitate behaviors and actions from their surroundings, most especially adults.
If you are a parent and are having difficulty in teaching your toddlers to focus and listen, don’t be too frustrated. Almost all parents have experienced this. You are not alone.
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So, what are the effective ways to solve this challenge? Here are ways for you to know how to make toddlers listen.
How to make toddlers listen: Effective ways
Be a good listener
They always say the best way to teach something is to let them see how to do it.
So, if you want to know how to make toddler listen and obey, you show them how to do it. Be a good listener.
How do you do this?
- Be attentive. Show them that your full attention is on them. Stop what you are doing and be interested and attentive to what they are trying to communicate. Don’t forget to make eye contact since this gesture shows them that you are really with your child.
- Be patient. When your child is trying to communicate with you, be patient. Toddlers sometimes have difficulty in finding the right term for what they want to communicate. Show them that you are willing to wait for them and that you have time for them.
- Be sure to let them finish what they want to say. Adults have the tendency to interject in conversations. However, if you want to show your toddler what listening is, make sure that you let them finish first. Respect their right to express what they want to express. Letting them finish first also allows you to understand completely what they want to say.
- Encourage them to talk. There are moments when a child feels that what they have to say is not important. Don’t let them feel this way. Instead, if you see that they want to say something, encourage and invite them to express it.
- Acknowledge nonverbal messages. Toddlers can communicate also through nonverbal messages. As a parent, observe your child’s tone of voice, facial expressions, posture and behavior. If you saw that there is a change to these, make sure that you kindly ask them what’s wrong.
Always call them by their name
Another way to effectively teach how to make your toddler listen is to call them out by their name.
When you call your child by their name, it gets their attention specifically. It gives them the idea that you have important information to say to them personally.
For example, when you want to stop your child from doing something that might harm them, call their name. Don’t just say “No! Don’t do that!”, instead call them out by name and tell them as to why you are stopping them.
Train them by calling their name out when you want them to listen.
Read to them
Reading is known to be a very effective way in knowing how to make toddlers listen. This activity is a good way to exercise and improve their listening skills. The stories that you get to read to them will capture their attention and imagination, encouraging them to be attentive and actually listen to you.
When you read to them, make sure you…
- Make this activity a part of your child’s day. Spend at least 15 minutes before their sleeping time.
- Be in close contact when you read. Let your child sit on your lap or snuggle up to you as you read the stories.
- Be creative in reading. When you read stories to your child, engage them by reading with fun in your voice. Use different voices for different characters in the stories. You can also use gestures and facial expression to make the reading fun.
- Point at pictures and words. Show your child the words and pictures when you read. This will help you get their focus and listen to the story.
Have meals together
Spending quality time over mealtime is also an effective way of knowing how to make toddlers listen.
The social interaction and conversations that happen during mealtimes can be a good venue for your toddler to observe on when to speak and when to listen. Sharing mealtimes with them will let them see the proper way of interacting. Also, this will give your child the opportunity to learn to interact, chat, and connect to the people around. It is also important that during these times, you help your toddler learn new words and teach them how to communicate properly.
There are many benefits to spending time with your child over meals. Not only will it teach your child to learn how to listen, but there is a chance that they will get to learn good and positive eating behaviours like good table manners.
Talk at eye level
Before a child will listen, they need to have a certain connection to the person that is trying to communicate with them.
Another best way for you to know how to make toddler listen without yelling is to get down and talk to them at eye-level. This gesture, leveling with them and looking at them in the eye, will grab your child’s attention and will be more willing to listen to what you say.
So, when your child starts to feel emotion and you need to calm them down, get down to their level or carry them in your arms so you can talk to them eye to eye. You then acknowledge how they feel or help them describe what they feel. It teaches them to listen to themselves and recognize that having emotions is normal.
Talking to them on their eye-level engages your child for a conversation and will also encourage them to communicate even more.
Motivate
Motivation and having a positive tone can help you make your toddler listen. Just like adults, toddlers want to be motivated, too.
If you want your toddler to listen to you, think of positive and creative ways to motivate them to finish a task. For example, if you want your toddler to brush their teeth before bedtime, you can sing your instructions to brush their teeth to them or give instructions and point out the benefits if they do so.
- Instead of saying “brush your teeth or you will be spanked”, you say “after you finish brushing your teeth, we will read your favorite bedtime story,”
- Every time they finish a task you have instructed, make sure to praise and acknowledge them.
When you choose to motivate them in doing an instruction, adding a positive tone to it, the humour, trust, and affection you show to your child will encourage them to listen to you. As much as possible, try not to shout at them since this will sound so negative and would not help you teach them genuine listening.
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Give specific instructions and follow through on it
Lastly, another effective way in knowing how to make toddlers listen is to show them that when you give a specific instruction and you follow through it.
When you tell your toddler to do something, expect that they are still in the developmental stages of their lives. Make your instructions realistic and something that they can gras. It would be better if you give specific instructions and provide some information that they can understand.
For example, when you want your toddler to put away their toys, be specific and realistic.
- Say “we will put the crayons away first” instead of “put away our toys.”
And, when you give instructions, make consequences clear as much as possible. If your toddler failed to obey or follow your instructions, follow through the consequences you told him. If they do finish the doing your instruction, make sure that you acknowledge them.
Teaching toddlers on how to listen can be challenging. The developmental stage they are in, the sense of doing things on their own, can be the reason why. However, this does not mean that they cannot be taught how to listen.
You can teach your toddler to listen.
Make sure that you have your full commitment and attention if you want to teach your toddler how to listen. Show them how to listen by interacting with them over mealtimes. Read them their favorite bedtime stories. Call them by your names when you give instructions to them. And when you do give instructions, give clear information that they can understand. Make sure that you follow through the consequences you have told them if they don’t want to obey and follow your instructions.
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