It’s a horrible feeling to have when you and your loved one are not in “okay terms”. You might be thinking if there’s something you did wrong, or if your partner is doing something you don’t know. You might be searching for clues on what to do when your relationship feels off.

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What is that “off” feeling?

That “off” feeling is what you get when you know something isn’t right. It’s that unsettling vibe that there’s a tension between the two of you. You aren’t sure how to approach the problem, because you aren’t even sure if there’s a problem in the first place.

It could be feelings of doubt, distance, or anything negative towards your partner. You may also feel like he or she is feeling that way towards you. It may be weird, but sometimes, couples go through this phase at one point in their relationship.

What to do when your relationship feels off – understand it more!

Perhaps you’re looking for a way to understand yourself and your partner more. Do you always want to have the desirable traits that a person should have in a relationship? No, it isn’t about changing yourself. It’s about adopting habits and attitudes that would further cultivate your marriage or relationship.

If you are wanting to understand it more, I encourage you to look into “What men want you to know but will never tell you” video and guide. As featured in Fox, NBC, and WebMD, this short guide has helped many women understand the things that men may fail to communicate.

What to do when your relationship feels off: 4 simple ways

1. Identify what’s making your relationship feel off

Often times, people can pinpoint the problem that makes them feel tension towards their partners. It could be the stress from work, a previous conversation, or something totally unrelated that bothers one of you. Whatever is making you feel off, identifying the cause can help you step closer towards solving the problem.

You can look back in retrospect, or think of previous events that happened that led to your current situation. Note if there was any trigger that caused it, whether it’s your inner emotions or an outer happening.

2. Show that you care, but don’t smother

When something that doesn’t feel right, we often feel threatened that we will lose the relationship with our partners. This could even lead to more conflict and would even come across as needy! You need to calm down about the situation, and avoid being codependent.

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Show that you care by your words and actions. Don’t overdo it to the point that you are bugging them about what’s wrong. Simple actions that you can do that you care can be:

• Physical – giving a simple kiss or hug
• Emotional/Verbal – saying “I love you, and I care”
• Actions – giving simple gifts, small surprises, dates

And do not feel resentful if these actions are not reciprocated. What matters is you show that you care, because love is about giving.

3. Remind them of your love

Showing that you care is different from reminding them of your love. Sometimes, it takes a bit more effort to know that you still love your partner no matter what. If showing that you care involves small gestures, reminding someone of your love is through the daily commitments you keep.

You can show your loved one that you are faithful even if there’s tension between the two of you. You can still forgive them even when they feel cold and distant towards you. That is a reminder of love.

4. Keep communication lines open

Some avoidant personality people would be angry and feel like they need to take revenge by shutting themselves down during an “off” time in the relationship. This can be risky and might be damaging to you as a couple, as this would cause you to feel comfortable despite the tension and distance.

If you do this very often, there might be a point that your partner is just used to not having you around! To avoid this from happening, you still need to keep your communication lines open. When your loved one asks you to talk, be open to talking. Express yourself, but be rational and always remind them of your love for them.

What to do when your relationship feels off: The takeaway

As you understand what to do when your relationship feels off, it is important to take away the lesson of showing your partner that you will be there no matter what.

This is why it is essential to understand how men’s minds work and to always develop attitudes that can make your relationship grow.

For counseling in problematic relationships, contact us.

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